diff --git i/modules/ext.wikimediaEvents.httpsSupport.js w/modules/ext.wikimediaEvents.httpsSupport.js
index fee3b94265..8b174b2d8e 100644
--- i/modules/ext.wikimediaEvents.httpsSupport.js
+++ w/modules/ext.wikimediaEvents.httpsSupport.js
@@ -10,7 +10,7 @@
 ( function ( mw, $ ) {
 	'use strict';
 
-	var pixelSrc = '//upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/c/c0/Blank.gif';
+	var pixelSrc = '//performance.wikimedia.org/blank.gif';
 
 	function inSample() {
 		var factor = mw.config.get( 'wgHttpsFeatureDetectionSamplingFactor' );
@@ -23,6 +23,15 @@
 		return Math.floor( Math.random() * factor ) === 0;
 	}
 
+	// Return a deferred object that is resolved after `ms` milliseconds.
+	function sleep( ms ) {
+		var defer = $.Deferred();
+		setTimeout( function () {
+			defer.resolve();
+		}, ms );
+		return defer;
+	}
+
 	function pingProtocol( proto, timeout ) {
 		var $beacon = $( '<img />' ),
 			defer = $.Deferred();
@@ -34,24 +43,34 @@
 		$beacon.attr( 'src', proto + ':' + pixelSrc + '?' + new Date() );
 
 		return defer.then( function () {
-			var ok = this.type === 'load' && $beacon.prop( 'width' ) === 1;
-			return ok ? 'success' : this.type;
+			var status = {}, ok = this.type === 'load' && $beacon.prop( 'width' ) === 1;
+			status[proto + 'Status'] = ok ? 'success' : this.type;
+			return status;
 		} );
 	}
 
+
 	// Log only if user is using HTTP and is included in the random sample.
 	if ( window.location.protocol !== 'https:' && inSample() ) {
 		mw.loader.using( 'schema.HttpsSupport', function () {
+			var protocols = [ 'http', 'https' ];
+
+			// Flip the order of tests 50% of the time.
+			if ( Math.floor( Math.random() * 2 ) ) {
+				protocols.reverse();
+			}
+
 			$.when(
-				pingProtocol( 'http' ),
-				pingProtocol( 'https' )
-			).done( function ( httpStatus, httpsStatus ) {
-				var event = {
-					httpStatus  : httpStatus,
-					httpsStatus : httpsStatus,
+				pingProtocol( protocols.pop() ),
+				pingProtocol( protocols.pop() ),
+				sleep( 6000 )
+			).done( function ( firstStatus, secondStatus ) {
+				console.log('in callback');
+				var event = $.extend( {
 					isAnon      : mw.config.get( 'wgUserId' ) === null,
 					userAgent   : navigator.userAgent
-				};
+				}, firstStatus, secondStatus );
+
 				if ( mw.mobileFrontend && mw.config.exists( 'wgMFMode' ) ) {
 					event.mobileMode = mw.config.get( 'wgMFMode' );
 				}